Feb 01 2012
What Was the Best Marriage Advice You ever Received?
The question is “What was the best marriage advice you ever received?” I recently heard this question and I’d like to share a few of the answers.
1. One person said shortly after he and his wife were married they were at a party and he was telling what he thought was a humorous story. He sarcastically said something negative about his wife and everyone laughed. He went on to say that when he got home his wife told him he had hurt her feelings.
He said he was only trying to be funny and hadn’t meant to hurt her feelings. After discussing it they both agreed to never say anything negative about each other in public. He then said that over the next couple of months he had a few slip ups but soon he developed the habit of not saying anything negative about his wife in public.
And she developed the same habit of not saying anything negative about him in public. Then he commented that overall this has had a wonderful effect on their marriage.Focusing on the positive things about each other in both public and private conversations has resulted in their building each other up rather than tearing each other down.
I agree with this habit. Being funny at your spouse’s expense can be very hurtful. We need to build each other up and support each other. Remember, as I’ve said before you need to be your spouse’s safe place and your spouse must be your safe place.
2. Another answer given was when one person said “I don’t recall any advice given on my wedding day, but fortunately I had received good advice on marriage after watching my parents for over 20 years. I watched as my mom watched science fiction movies with my dad even though she would have rather watched musicals or romantic comedies.
“From watching her do this, I learned about putting my spouse’s wants before my own. I also learned about treating my spouse with consideration and respect from watching my dad as he always opened the door for my mom. He never allowed us to speak disrepectfully to her. I learned that continued courtship is important, even if time or money are short. I watched as my parents took time to go on dates, walking together or simply talking somewhere away from the children.”
I agree totally with taking that time to be with each other, we need to stay interested in each other and in each others’ needs and wants. I know in our marriage that taking this time together really has paid off big time for us. I would recommend it. It’s soooooooooo much fun! Well, I’m about of space for this post and I have a few more answers to the question but I’ll save those for next time. In the mean, do all of us a favor and post your own answer to the question.
I definitely believe that one should not say anything negative about one’s mate in public. At our house, we can disagree or tease each other at home (although even that can be hurtful at times). But in public, no way.
[...] Comments Lois Hjelmstad on What was the Best Marriage Advice You ever Received?Lois Hjelmstad on Habits Behind the Wrapping Paper and the BowsLois Hjelmstad on Families, [...]